Day One – or so I thought.
So, I asked myself – what do I have to say that others haven’t already said concerning their cancer treatment journey? Probably nothing…there are so many eloquent stories that have gone before me – but, of course, the difference is that this is MY cancer treatment journey. Truly, this blog is going to be more about life than about a small window of my life, and in reality, I’ve lived more of life than I have left.
Admittedly, I have mixed feelings about the entire process of treatment for something that was the size of a dime, surgically removed, which made me cancer-free, I’m told, but then supposedly has to be blasted to kingdom come by 30 days of radiation treatments. Because I chose the option of surgery, my little breast has to burn-baby-burn. The two go hand-in-hand; I get it; it was explained to me at least 10 times. And believe it or not, I am thankful that a mammogram found the tumor early, (LADIES: do yourselves a favor and get your mammograms!). Unfortunately for my doctors, however, I have not gone quietly into the protocol like a good soldier…nor should you. I’ve asked a myriad of questions, which they each have answered patiently; well, two of them have answered patiently. I have done research and talked to a friend in the oncology field and consulted alternative treatment folks. I have refused one treatment and agreed to others. And, my husband and I have prayed.
Which brings us to today, my first treatment…except there wasn’t a first treatment; it didn’t happen because – are you ready? The radiology office called and cancelled because THE MACHINE WAS BROKEN. Seriously. This builds such confidence in a soul, right? Not so much! Thankfully, my confidence is not resting in a radiology doctor or a radiation machine.
Did I mention that I have prayed throughout this journey and that God has assured me that He has this thing in His hand? Today was a minor setback. At first, I was frustrated because I had cancelled an appointment to be at radiation…ok, more honestly, I was angry because my schedule had been changed. My husband reminded me when I called to tell him of the change of plans that we are probably going to have to learn to be flexible during this process. Ugh; not my best feature! However, earlier I had prayed that God would teach me and use me during this time of treatment…I can be a little slow, but I think He may be answering me.
Lesson #1: flexibility.